Oud Minérale
Tom Ford (2017)

A stomach turning aquatic that won't quit. Aquatics are my least favorite smell, but I had hoped for a revelation with oud. Not so.

Tenacious. Unbearable. Discontinued for a reason. I scrubbed twice with soap. It survived. Drenched with 99% rubbing alcohol and brushed with a hand brush. It survived. Considering self amputation of my left arm.

You've been warned!

Charred wood, left on the beach from last night's bonfire. Wafts of smoke still drift through the air as the morning's high-tide extinguishes the embers and soaks the wood in salty brine. There is a chill to the air, beneath a grey sky, as summer surrenders to the changing season.

Had I known this was an aquatic I guess i would have passed as I don't like them pretty much universally, but running through the drug store to get emergency toothpaste I thought I'd get a spritz of this oud some some, as I don't dislike Oud Wood entirely and I do like Oud Wood Intense. The opening is underwhelming but ok with the titled Oud and minerality, saltishness and from there descended swiftly into olfactory hell. The calonic aqua ozoney mixed synthetic oud was just stomach turning and after a vigorous scrub remained unpleasant and relentless woodyambers that kept tormenting me for hours...

The opening notes presents as a marine-influenced blast of sea salt, sea weed - the 'minerale' side presumably that the name indicates..

There are also the fumes of a petrol station, with petrol fumes in the background.

Soon the oud arrives. It an agreeable, soft, smooth wood and a far cry from the shrill and synthetic-intrusive unpleasantness that often camouflages as oud wood. Restrained pink peppers and an equally smooth styrax add just a modicum on contrast.

I get moderate sillage, very good projection, and a longevity on my skin of six hours.

A pleasant oud/marine mix in the first phase, which is agreeable, with an original twist, and with an unusually balanced oud - not the real stuff, of course. The second phase, however, is rather bland though, and lacks depth and vibrancy, and develops into a very ordinary sweetish-ozonic tedium. Overall 2.75/5

You're taking a stroll on a wet, rocky beach adjacent to an evergreen forest. Someone has built a driftwood fire in the distance. As you walk, you sip a dram of Laphroaig and breathe in the sea air, with wafts of salt spray, seaweed, and smoke from the distant campfire pairing perfectly with the smoked peat notes in your Islay whisky.

This smells more like the ocean than any other supposed marine fragrance I've smelled personally. As a sailor and aficionado of Islay Scotch, this scent was love at first sniff. The name is a bit misleading though, because if there's any oud in this it's so well blended that it just fades into the woodsy resinous base, adding its magic there. It is a very unique scent, and one of my favorites.

Oud Minérale is fascinating.

It's such a weird combination of notes and yet it all works together unexpectedly well. Plus, it smells exactly like the beach. And I mean EXACTLY like the beach, with all its delightful smells and all of its wretched bad odours. It's really quite uncanny and I feel instantly transported to one of my local beaches.

Performance wise, it's bloody brilliant. I am right now in the tenth hour of a wear and it is still projecting strongly into my nostrils from only one spray in each elbow pit. Quite unbelievable for something so "marine".

Yet, having said all that, and despite the fact I find it intriguing and love its performance, I don't actually really like how it smells. One minute, it smells fine, and then the next, it smells totally off putting. Utterly confusing and I can't make up my mind on it.

I suppose, however, that further adds to its mystery and what makes it so interesting to me.

Neutral.